Romina Movie is a Cringeworthy Slasher on Netflix

“Romina” is a Mexican horror/thriller slasher movie available on Netflix, directed by Diego Cohen. About halfway through, I had had enough of it. I used to stick around and watch tonnes of films that had no redeeming qualities. But I was surprised that this was annoying me so much. I took to Facebook to ask the question…Is Romina worth watching to the end? This is a spoiler-filled Romina film review.

Did the second half of this slasher movie redeem it from the first half? Read on to find out.

What Is Romina About?

• Set at a camping ground called…wait for it… Crystal Lake, a group of teenagers discovers someone is spying on them. In the search to find out who, they find a lot more than they bargained for.
• Director and writer: Diego Cohen.
• Romina’s cast includes Francisca Lozano, Arantza Ruiz, Oliver Nava, Claudia Zepeda, Walter Bercht, Roberto Beck, Victor Bonilla, Eduardo Negrete, and Diego Cohen.
• Where to Watch Romina Online
• Release: A Mexican film with an internet release on 13th July 2018. Yes, it is a Friday.
• Genres:  Horror | Thriller

Romina Official Trailer

Before I get into the nitty-gritty. I love foreign films. I recently watched a Mexican film just this last week called Tigers Are Not Afraid (2018) and it was wonderful. I loved Pan’s Labyrinth (2006) and Devils Backbone (2001). Another film in Spanish (although not made in Mexico) is Veronica (2017) and I loved that too.

Now I am going to do something I don’t do very often and I apologize in advance. The more I immerse myself in critiquing films, the more I understand that every film is like someone’s baby. But this film sucked the big one on almost every level and I can’t find anything nice to say about it.

I took no issues with the performances of those within this mess of substance. They did pretty well considering the story they were a part of. I make allowances for many banal and generic things. Just ask people who read my reviews regularly. Sometimes I think my taste in film is like that of a functioning alcoholic. I can certainly appreciate the higher-thinking man’s movie, but I also like to slum it.

Ch Ch Ch Ch Ah Ah Ah Ah

Romina starts like it has good intentions. A bit of in-media res never goes astray. A bunch of kids going camping— check. Slinging insults in the car amidst teenage banter — check Crystal Lake — yep I’m still with you. Nothing like a bit of Mexican Ch Ch Ch Ch Ch Ah Ah Ah Ah

The motive here is clear, Romina camps within spitting distance of a bunch of ‘friends’ who didn’t invite her. Skinny dips in the lake and does a little flash striptease for two of the boys she notices are watching her from the bushes. Some off-screen violence ensues and the boys return to camp as if nothing has happened. Someone is spying on them so the group begins a search party, torches in hand.  They don’t give up, they even go back to the seedy guy who runs the campsite and asks him if he is the one spying on them.

It’s about this point that my enthusiasm wanes. Romina uses her sexy wiles to coax a few deaths out after destroying their car overnight. People start dropping like flies. The rapist gets the longest drawn-out death and is repeatedly shown in a scene of him tied to a tree, with a bone stuck haphazardly out of his ankle while he uses his legs to struggle against his restraints.

Many of the attacks aren’t shown on screen, but rather just the result of her ensuing reign of terror. But how? Did she eat spinach and pop some newfound muscles onto her tiny body? Did she bring some machinery I didn’t notice to prop one of the guys later up onto a tree?

Is Romina A Good Movie?

The whole thing just doesn’t wash out, not even when she returns to some of the guys and girls she hogties or lassos loosely to a small tree and scrapes their eyes out with a spoon. She even rapes one of the girls with a broken bottle. And then the twist. One of the guys is in on it somehow. He tells her they all deserve it and they enjoy passionate blood-smeared smooch after splattering one of the groups’ heads with a rock.

I think it’s an attempt at a Scream crossed with Friday the 13th Mexican slasher film but it just didn’t work. If the final guy was in on it why did she flash the other guys? Is it a testament to the opening conversation about girls who wear sexy clothing?

You just can’t mix politics and slasher films.. or can you? I don’t know, I just want to move on. Of course, Romina gets away with it as seen at the beginning of the film. I mean, why wouldn’t she? She couldn’t lift that rock. I know it, you know it.

And why did she kill that bunny? Why? Was it to warm up for the next hour?

The Romina movie on Netflix is rated

2 the bunny didn’t deserve it out of 5